Pointless Malice

I understand jealousy. We are all do. We’ve all been jealous of someone or the other. I understand its human and for most part, I know when I get jealous. Unlike what some people tell me, I don’t feel confused when I am jealous. Instead I feel a moment of complete clarity of what I want and where I want to get to. I was only just discussing this with my husband, who pointed out that when I get jealous of something or someone, I become superbly determined. Anyways, the point is, I get jealousy but what I don’t get is malice.

People say intense jealousy leads to malice. Perhaps they are right but I don’t understand why people cannot channel their jealousy the right way. If you are jealous of something, why not try to achieve it or get it for yourself, instead of thrashing of harming the object of our jealousy. Why? I know someone like that. A very malicious person and he shocks me everyday. The sheer malice in him and the bad vibes he sends out baffles me. WHY? HOW? How can someone get so malicious?

How can someone be jealous of everyone. Every being? How? No matter how much I think, I cannot seem to wrap my head around the emotion. From a stranger on his evening jog to colleagues in different departments to the CEO’s family, how is it possible for a person to hate everyone and wish evil for everyone. How does that make him happy? How can he attend a wedding, pose for pictures with the bride and groom, eat their food, drink their booze and then step outside the venue and make comments about how he predicts their marriage won’t last? Why does their happiness and well being bother him so much? Why can he not find happiness in anything? Why is making life hell for others by back stabbing them or bad mouthing them the only that makes him happy? How does he explain him to himself? How does he sleep at night.

I’ve lived in 3 countries, in 3 continents, in 3 time zones. I’ve met multitude of people, worked in contrasting work environments yet what I’ve never come across is a person like him. A person with only malice in him. His actions makes me speechless and because we live in a small island, it is extremely difficult to distance yourself or keep away from the negativity. It effects you and brings you down. There are a few of my colleagues who can keep their calm and move forward but not me. I cannot. I feel the need to give him one tight slap and shake him till all the maliciousness falls off him. Who goes to a party, eats and drinks with a vengeance; not cause he is hungry but to rake up a bill for for the host. Who does that?

Tell me, am I wrong is wanting to set mad dogs on him? Am I completely unjustified in wanting publicly humiliate him? To teach him a lesson? He thrives on everyone else’s silence. Am I wrong is wanting to speak up, speak out against him. Everyone tell me to keep quiet, to hold my tongue cause he is on pally terms with the top management and has framed people before and gotten them fired. Should I be afraid? Cause what I feel is not fear but hatred to this complete apology for a human being. Am I wrong in feeling such strong emotions?

I know this is an angry post but I’m glad I wrote this cause suddenly I feel a little (not a lot) better. Have you had people like him in your life? Miserable and pointlessly malicious individuals? Karma, I’ve heard tons about you being a bitch and I think about now would be the time to own up to that reputation and work your magic! I’m waiting!

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13 thoughts on “Pointless Malice

  1. I know how you are feeling. I had a co-worker friend that was very jealous of me (not sure why bc my life is fulfilling but very difficult) and she did so much to hurt me (see my post http://abbbz.wordpress.com/2013/08/24/blogging-while-being-cyber-bullied/) It makes no sense but that’s just how some ppl are. You are not wrong for feeling this way but I would hope you would not even WASTE your time hating him. Karma is a bitch and what goes around does come around. Its true. I have seen it with my own eyes. I feel more pity for these types of ppl than hatred. Ugh can you even imagine the amount of time and effort it would take for all that malice? I just dont have the time for it!

    • I understand what you are saying. He is not even worth an emotion from us. But it still makes me wonder, how can a single person hate and harbor intense jealousy for everyone in their life? From someone he does not even know (like a jogger who passed by our building while we were waiting for a ride..he saw him jogging away happily and immediately commented that his efforts at staying fit are in vain cause very soon he is going to get hit by a car or a bus if he runs ..who says such things) to people he knows. He is exasperating me. I know I should not be affected but I cannot help it. he.makes.me.so.angry.

      • I can relate-sometimes ppl think they are funny and really they are just being eaten alive with all that fury. Its sad and I can say, next time push him in front of a bus! JK!!!! some ppl are just to much!

    • It is a rather miserable was of living, isn’t it? Like I said, his very being baffles me.

      Oh thank you for the award, I’ve already received it once buy hey, I always have room for more love..thanks again!

      • You’re welcome. šŸ™‚ The Liebster is one of those weird ones where you never know who’s received it and who hasn’t. LOL

  2. I used to encounter someone like you said. Even though their hates didn’t directly throw at me but I could feel it. Anyway, I tried to distinct myself from them because I didn’t want to deal with that kind of person. I don’t think I am an angelic person but I don’t think I am a bad person, and sometimes good people might not be safe if dealing with malicious person like that because they could come up with something bad (and good people can’t think of something like that). dealing with them might not cause the worthwhile consequence because if they choose to behave like that, they might not care of anyone but themselves. and that’s the scary part for me.

    • I know what you mean. They can stoop to any level and that is a scary proposition but I tell you, this unbearable suffocation of having to share space with so much malice, so much evil is mind numbing. As much as I try to keep away, there are times I am forced to be in the same room and it takes all my self control to keep me from turning to him and slapping him silly. I tell you, every time I am around him my anger towards him, that unfortunately I have to contain within myself, kills a few of my brain cells. Why God why?

  3. Glad you’re feeling better. If a jealous person/hater wants to take away someone’s light and spend the precious minutes of their life doing so, I say let them. What a sorry way to live, and just goes to show they’re not happy. They’re loss.

    Glad to see your post Nenne! I’ve missed you šŸ™‚

    xx,
    Rakhi

    • Awww! Thank you!

      And yeah, I’ve come to peace with people like him. They lead a truly miserable life and I only feel sorry for them. My life is way too much fun and dear to me to harbour constant hatred for someone. Also, I’ve realised that for every nasty person out there, god and the universe has balanced it out with a wonderful person. I’ll do a post on that soon.

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